I Remember You (Ode to Ayahuasca and the Indigenous)

How does this medicine
help me forgive?
Pain turned to light
where the sorrow used to live.
And even though my habbits
aren’t completely changed
I’ve found a love I can’t forget it
it extends across the cosmic range
Where stars give birth to butterflies
and other beautiful things
Quantum particle of my heart
it’s light that makes me sing

Oh Mother Ayahuasca
Do you know what you saved me from?
I was trapped in a maze of mirrors
into your arms I run
Oh Mother Ayahuasca
Do you know what you made me feel?
there’s a soul somewhere inside of me
the skin of my ego peeled.

and my heart is naked
in the middle of the night
it beats so perfect
I am freed from my plight
my heart is naked
in the middle of the night
it beats so perfect
I am freed from my plight

De ja vu, De ja Vu
Is just a soul memory
Do you remember me?
Do you

remember

me?

I

remember

you.

I remember you.

Kevon Simpson 2016 ©

Ayahuasca: A year later

It is the evening after a ceremony weekend, or the purge as it is also known, a whole year since my first time sitting with the ancient jungle brew Ayahuasca. There is an egocentric idea in the minds of many people that think that what happens on a medicine journey can be done on ones own. So they watch from the distance and judge. Though, all one has to do is turn on the television for a few minutes of the evening news to see just how good humanity handles things on its own. Indeed there are many paths to the deepest awakening of life purpose available to us all during this wonderful age of ascension, and in that regard, it is vitally important to protect this very special one. A knowing of which is only available to you in countless documentaries and articles because our amazon is being destroyed, and thus from the destruction this secret was exposed. So our plant guardians are reaching out to those who will listen, and that is the calling one hears before drinking Ayahuasca. The subtlety of plant communication made clear in the heart of ones awareness. It is the desire to experience a mode of healing that hasn’t gone through the rational mind of science, or the pockets of big pharma.

Ruysen Flores Venancino_38After a deep betrayal a few years ago, my life began to spiral slowly out of control. I found myself in the company of poisonous people (I fully acknowledge that at times, I too have been the poisonous one for others, so this is not about blame) who did not want to see me succeed. My life consisted of living within a beauty destroying nest of hungry venomous snakes who were addicted to drugs and keeping it a secret. So, step one of my healing, was taking responsibility for the situation I allowed myself to be asleep in due to a lack of self-respect, and a lack of self-love. You see, I wanted the healing for others more than I sought it for myself; dedicated my life to it. Though, what I call “healing” I have come to understand as a remembering of the perfection that is already within, at the time however, I approached it from a perspective of trying to “fix” people, and even myself. The call of the medicine got louder and louder during this time, and after a failed attempt at raising the funds to go to Peru, I began to fine tune my intent. I allowed into my awareness the possibility that maybe these kinds of ceremonies were being done in the U.S.A but underground, and I was right.

Though I will not go into specific details due to our current laws around entheogenic compounds, I will say that working with Ayahuasca was not my first mind altering experience. Though, heart altering is a more accurate description. In fact, these experiences have been pivotal in the unfolding of my ability to forgive and be a vibrating source of tireless love for so many in my life. Meditation has also been a vital tool for the integration and application of entheogenic experiences that forced me to break open my human level of compassion by contemplating the kind of compassion it takes to be a planet. So when I weigh the ability of our planet’s heart to give, next to the ability of my own heart to give, I see that the room for growth is infinite. A heart full of pain can not support life. So, meditating on planetary compassion now comes with a richness of layered meaning that wasn’t available to me before. Yet I understand that “the planet’s heart” is still a foreign concept to some. If even just a thought, it is a beautiful thought that if integrated into ones awareness, and the awareness of those in positions of power specifically, the destruction of our forests would not be happening, nor would the bombing of each other be a real thing in our world.

juan-Carlos-Taminchi-6I can write pages upon pages of the images I’ve seen during these journeys, and speak to you of the ancestors greeting me with joy. However, the message that came through after a year of clearing childhood traumas, stepping into my path as a shaman and more, was: Remember what you didn’t see. After a year of repeating the message “remember what you see” La Madre Medicina flipped it on me! I am not only in awe of the teaching, but in how it was delivered. How is it that a plant remembered its place in the pages of the book of inspiring my life? How does it remember where it left off, and continue teaching months later? We are being called to remember that beyond the perceivable spectrum of light, there is still light. We are being called to remember that beyond the perceivable spectrum of sound, there is still sound. We are being called to remember that beyond the perceivable spectrum of feeling there are still feelings unknown, untapped – the uncharted territories of creation. Entire worlds dwell in lightless silent spaces. It is from these spaces that the complexity of imagination has its origin, and is then made manifest in our physical reality.

So a year later, I’m still with the same lovely community, and I’ve made some very special friends who understand me, and support me blossoming into more than I ever imagined for my life. I sometimes sing in ceremony and play my steel tongue drum Tully, her name means peace. Thanks to Ayahuasca I got over the fear of being a musician, and in allowing my heart to sing, I help others do the same. You should see me banging my djembe down the street, playing my didgeridoo for the neighborhood, or playing Tully in the subway. After a year of this work, I am happy to say that I feel like it is wonderful to be myself. I used to hate existing, and that is now a thing of the past.

Seeing In The Dark

remember what you didn’t see
hiding for eternity
the phantoms that swim
in spaces unknown
until you decide to make them shown

and you can hold them hiding well
though they bring chaos as they swell

flashing lights and secret sights
in sacred spaces glow
as you seek the more you learn
remember what they didn’t show

-by Kevon Simpson (written during ceremony)

La Madre. La Medicina. Gracias Gracias Gracias.

Rainbow Serpent

Medicine Message 2: Freedom To Be Wild

What is in you is wild and repressed. You hide by lowering your volume, and by trying to silence what is externally loud, as your heart screams its disastrous vibrations above it all. There is nothing to conquer, when someone allows you to help, it is not an invitation to take everything over. In positions of leadership, your suppressed wild side shows. Temporarily in the shadow, it waits for its moment to deconstruct and destroy the beautiful gift being presented to you. When trapped in ego, you allow the rising of the hidden shadow to win, you allow yourself to blame the poison in you on someone else. You bring the chaos, by nature of the chaos within you, that you ignore. Look in the mirror, and be honest with how you prepared for the ceremony. Take into account the energetic residue of the days before and the actions you took. Lots of TV, sex, drugs, unhealthy foods, and partying is not how to prepare for a ceremony, especially if you are in a position of leadership. There is not enough sage in the world that will take away the fact that you have to work on cleansing your own energy as a daily part of your life, while being mindful of who you allow to walk through it. You’re not a garbage can.

Don’t pretend to know or understand what anyone is doing, saying, or feeling, until you have made resting in silence a priority in your life. You can’t truly hear anyone through the noisy filter of a clouded mind filled with expectations. You can’t feel the sincerity, nor trust the process of what is being presented, from a fearful heart. You can’t control the gift, nor the gift giver. When you attempt that, you rob yourself of the surprise that brings joy, because you think only your way is the way. It is impossible for you to control everything. You don’t walk into the emergency room and start doing your own stitches. Allow yourself to be helped. Humility is key, you were alone before the thing to be “taken over” presented itself, it is that desire of taking things over and controlling what is not yours, that keeps you in addictive lonely spirals. You want to numb the feeling of failure from trying to control that which you can not. The work is bigger than us all, sit down and learn. If you think you can do it better, please, start. More people are needed. Learn the medicine songs, write your own, learn the meditations, read the books, write the poetry prayers, create the following, create the questionnaire, read them, learn the instruments, be an activist outside of ceremony, respond to each need with sincerity, remember repeatedly that it is not about you, show up strong despite how exhausting the preparation can be, survive being ignored and under appreciated, be willing to die for it, be willing to be locked up for it, take the risk. If none of that sounds like it is to your liking, please be quiet, sit down, and take that moment to pull the blanket over your head and cry, be open to being helped, let the pain out. My body is not my age, neither is yours.

See beyond the limitation.
I See – is a prayer.
Freedom to be wild.

Love and Kindness are enough.

Recipe: Becoming a Wild Flower in a Paved World

You will need a few things
and you have none of them right now.
Read that lie again, and erase it from your mind.
That is step one, overcoming the lie
that you are not enough.

Skipping that step,
will burn everything before you begin.
You are not clever enough
to thwart the laws of manifestation,
and why would you want to?
To prove what? That you are alone?

See your self-masochism for what it is.
The universe is you,

Stop denying your own support.

Because you hurry through so much
I find pleasure in repeating my lines
a sentence is easier than an incarnation
so I write to remind you
and to free my soul.

See your self-masochism for what it is.
The universe is you,

Stop denying your own support.

The time between steps varies
from wild flower to wild flower.
The past serves only as compost.
A summer bloomed orchid
and a plastic house plant
will never be alike.
Celebrate the real in you,
let rotting things rot,
and allow the melting of the facade.
Open the window of your eyes
and let the stinging soot out,
allow it not to cloud your future anymore.

You must find the other hippies.
Listen to what they have to say.
Some have grown up,
and stopped wearing their flowers,
they conformed out of safety,
but they give themselves away,
via the hope they still have for the world.
They are the first to help in a disaster.
They can’t help it. Thank God.

Broaden your concept of God,
to fit more than the people,
who look just like your tribe.
All humans look alike,
stop killing our rain forests
and its animals.

And now for Step 2
This thing here we call life,
is all about you,
and indeed the butterfly too.
Finish the rest of this poem,
with the delicate actions of your life.

Let Bake for an entire age.

Serving Size: Planetary.

Kevon Simpson 2015©

Morning Meditation Message 21

It is okay to be on the verge of tears, in a place not fit for them. Not many places in our world are dedicated to crying, so you must take the spaces as they arrive. Knowing that anyone who judges your emotional out pour, is holding a secret tear too. People will be mad at you for not helping them uphold their illusion of keeping it together. Compassion is contagious. Some see your tear, and remember that they too need to cry, and in that particular moment, they may not want to remember, they may not want to embrace the collective wound. Now here you come, all heart on your sleeve like. Your nakedness makes people uncomfortable. It is okay to make people uncomfortable. It doesn’t take much. Did you get into how crowded this place is yet? We were bound to bump into your tears sooner or later. Every drop is perfect. And I know you know, just like I know, tears do dry, wounds do heal, and life – though it never ended – somehow begins again. Have a perfect day. Remember that it is your perspective that makes it so. Aho!

Morning Meditation Message 20

Learn to say no, politely if you must. It doesn’t have to be shouted filled with conflicting feelings of pain and discomfort birthed from a desire to endlessly please that which is killing you. Not everything offered freely is for you. Learn to say no. No to the self judgement, no to the abusive relationship, no to the abusive job out of alignment with your true purpose, no to the harboring of unresolved feelings in the heart, no to the mean things you say to yourself in your mind. A wise soul once told me “Kevon, No, is a complete sentence.” Sometimes we want to explain and justify our reasoning to the one who doesn’t understand our refusal of whatever it is, saying no and repeating it with calm in your eyes can easily get your point across. If something is unhealthy for your being, why do you think you need more words than “no” to end it? Sometimes the first thing to let go of is the unneccessary use of words in situations that are best handled in silence. If no does not work, say it while walking away. Let the decision to honor your most beautiful self be so strong, that it moves your feet into the possibility of your dream. You have said yes to so much crap that makes your spirit ill. Feed your purpose clarity, by learning to say no.

To My Keepers

Gate Keeper
Wisdom Keeper
Keeper of the key of words
How you open a chord, tuning
As forks that vibrate together
Familiar sadness, familiar joy, unlocked.
You are an opener of worlds
Gate Keeper
Wisdom Keeper
Keeper of the way of words
And how they sway to say the same thing
Thing same the say to sway they how and
Even in reverse
The clear is made message
Or is the message made clear
Or is it both?
The hummingbird
That flies backwards
The sunlight stings
Failed suicide eye
Wing of dusted moth
Flame of your soul
You are worthy of remembering
Gate Keeper
Wisdom Keeper
Keeper of the Key of words
This one is for you
When you wake in the morning
Flooded by the sadness
Of a drowned world
When you remember
That the salt in the water
Is really the tears of our children
As we lay on the sand
It dries on our skin
Summer isn’t the only season
Some wounds are like winter
Frozen hearts
Tears that fall as snowflakes
How many times do you have to hear it?
Your beauty is beyond adjectives
Gate Keeper
Wisdom Keeper
Do you remember who you are?
Fire in your soul
Repetition, unravels
The thread of forgetting
You are made to melt things
You are made to thaw
To make minds feel like spring
Keeper of the way of words
Stop playing with your time here
Clean your glasses
Cleanse the lens of your heart
See yourself clearly
Orchid Butterfly
Maker of nectar
We taste with our ears
Can’t spit out what was fed
Careful the words you say to yourself
When no one is watching
I can hear you not believing in you
I can feel you not believing in you
The madness of the world
Is you Not believing in You
That secret whispering dream
That you think is going to fail
Is Asking for you to Believe in it Fully
Wisdom Keeper
Gate Keeper
Keeper of the way of words
Awaken.

Kevon Simpson 2015 ©

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Morning Meditation Message 18

Situations will arise to put fear and frustration in your heart. If you have cleared your intuitive channels you will be prepared long before they arrive. However, if you aren’t prepared, the situation will still sharpen you and make you much stronger. Be open to that. As you open to the truth of all that is, you will feel relief in remembering that all life is cradled, including your own. Surrender to the moment and experience knowing that all is well, and that you will safely be carried to your next destination. There are bigger forces operating behind the veil supporting you, nourishing you, keeping your life in tact. You can not see gravity, but it is there, acting on even the molecular structure of your being. You can not see certain wavelengths of light, but they are there. Allow yourself to feel safe and cradled during the transition, so that your vibration continues attracting the unfolding of your highest most harmonious purpose on Earth.

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Amen, Ashe, Aho, Namaste. 🙂

Morning Meditation Message 17

Contemplate your cosmic origin. The you before the body of human. All around is the evidence of return. Like an inhale and an exhale, our bodies are filled with life and are emptied. You are the life force, not the body. Like the trunk of a fallen tree that becomes the soil, so too will we disperse and give way to other expressions of life after our time here. Light is the soil of the soul, life is both an exploration of expansion and a return trip. Use your time here – in that beautiful specific incarnation that you are – well. It took billions of years to make you, and to leave within the fabric of your creation the freedom for you to be absolutely ridiculous. What do I mean? Well, ridiculous in the sense that sometimes you believe that your imperfections are greater than the infinite wisdom coded into – not only your soul as geometric manifestations of light – but also in the genetic codes of your body; the history of your people. Contemplate your cosmic origin, you are an exquisite being that chose to forget why you came here, so that you may feel the beauty of remembering. You wanted a break from the infinite wisdom of the soul, and a taste of new undiscovered experience. Have you had your fill of forgetting yet? I know I have! Stop judging what you see in the mirror, you are a miracle still in expansion, a miracle that not one of us can truly comprehend or put into words. Enter the doors of your hearts calling, and let gratitude carry you beyond the illusion of your limitations.

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Amen, Ashe, Aho, Namaste. 🙂

Help

Too afraid to need people, too afraid to love
Too afraid to need people, too afraid to hug
Too afraid to be the one on receiving end
Too afraid to be the one, truly a friend

So, we disguise how we need people
With clever little games
Do this and do that for me now
Confusing all the names

Who is it that is owed, if everything is one
Who made the palms of hands
Perhaps that which made the drums
You are harmony made of rhythm
Pretending you don’t need music
So, alone in silence you sit and sulk
Just about to lose it

Blaming all the world
For every problem you face
Still, my compassion remains infinite
A divine gift of grace
I didn’t come to harm you
I only came to care
Now you send those broken wounds
Launched through silent air

How is it that you think
The energy was missed
I know you need me too
For you, a silent  kiss
Blown from hand
In the realm of thought
where all things begin
The reason why you lose
Too focused on the win
The sideways secret game
To get more than you give
Taking food from another
Expecting them to live

You don’t see the pain you cause
Only what’s done to you
How can you let anyone in
With a barbed wire point of view

Too afraid to need people, too afraid to love
Too afraid to need people, too afraid to hug
Too afraid to be the one on receiving end
Too afraid to be the one, truly a friend

Kevon Simpson 2015 ©