This one is for the men, and the ideas we have about men that no longer inspire positive behavior. I am around women very often and I get to hear what they think about men – and what is not said, I get to see in the way that they treat us. Women have been hurt by men in countless ways, but the deep hate and bitterness some women feel towards men is counterproductive to creating true equality. Man and woman aside, seeking revenge, however subconscious the action may be, will always create the perpetuation of an undesired state of emotion and action. The circle of abuse begins to reinforce itself, with a lack of communication and forgiveness as its fuel. I have seen some amazing things, groups about how to deal with men, how to change ideas about men, with no men invited or involved. Here is how ridiculous that is. Men have done that in trying to understand women, and boy do we all know the outcome of that – we have understood even less about the beautiful beings that give birth to all of us.
I would suggest learning from the mistakes of men and doing something different, enough with this subtle “eye for an eye” way of doing things. Imagine a class that is all about oranges, how to bake with them, make juice with them, face cream with them, body wash with them – only the teacher never brings in any oranges. Does that make any sense? No. Why? Because the lessons unfold within the actual interaction with the very thing you are trying to learn, otherwise it is quite simply a limited observation, limited once again by each individuals perception that has been fed by their expectations or lack thereof. So, how is it that we are meeting to talk about having more understanding towards each other, while leaving the other out? What the other thinks, is vitally important. While I’m on the topic, in the same way that women don’t like to be objectified, it is not fair to do that to men. To sum us up to our genitals and to leave us to lift things, is not all that we are here for. Some women are so caught up in their pain that they can’t even recognize a good man when he shows up, because sometimes, the good man can’t even recognize his own self. Why? Because all around him since childhood are people who remind him of his expected ineptitude in clear ways. We are individuals, but we are also social, and we learn from each other even when we think that we aren’t. So if you hear your whole life “Men are dogs,” “Men are stupid and have no idea what they’re doing,” and all the other things that are said as a general categorization of all men – why then are women surprised at the bark and leave. Everyone is responsible for each other, and we are co-creating this world. We have to change the way we think about each other in order to see something truly different unfold. Step one, lets stop leaving each other out of the conversation. With less baggage, the plane of love flies higher.